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I approve of the all-steel body kit, and just about everything else, on the Van Buren Boys G-Body Cutlass, but I’ve had some questions about them boys’ so-called 500-buck budget in the past. Unless they’ve found a magical 1/4-price junkyard in their hometown, something about the numbers ain’t quite addin’ up. With my skepticism in mind, they provided a handy illustrated guide to their latest upgrades at the ‘Shine Country Classic a couple months back. 
 
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This Cutlass is pretty quick, finishing the race 15th overall and getting a best lap time just about a second slower than the winner. Sure, it’s possible to get G-body and small-block Chevy parts cheap, but you have to convince the LeMons Supreme Court that your accounting doesn’t smell fishy. 
 
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So, the Van Buren boys brought helpful diagrams to the BS Inspection in downtown Camden, South Carolina. 
 
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Here’s the “Future LeMons Champion” handing $35 to the car’s seller, a man with red baseball cap, beer belly, and lack of understanding that scrap steel sells for $250/ton. 
 
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As for the “injun” and brakes, the Van Buren boys found a GMC G20 van. A tree served as an injun hoist. Price: 100 bucks. 
 
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A trip to the “Local Pull-uh-Part” got them this “cop-cab cheety LSD Big 10-bolt.” 
 
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Such a deal! 
 
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Next stop: Swap Meet, for a “Saggy-naw 4-speed” and some NASCAR wheels. According to the Van Buren boys, they “Swapped tranny for $150 and a bag of syringes from sum shady dude wearing a ski mask. We think it might be stolen.” 
 
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Yes, this does look like a shady dude. 
 
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Stolen street signs, Infiniti tailpipes, styled box-flared fenders, and the nickels are as good as theirs! This document served as ironclad proof that the Van Buren boys were close enough to legit that we let them race BS-lap-free. Next time… we’ll see.

8 Responses to “Explaining How Your Racin’ Oldsmobile Got All Those Nice Parts So Cheap”

  1. Shawn

    Greden Cab Company. Sounds cheaty to me…

  2. EyeMWing

    There’s a problem there. There’s NO WAY a supercharged motor came out of a G20 as pictured. I’m not saying you couldn’t make a blown G20 - my G20 conversion van had a blower - but it became physically impossible to remove the engine from the front - the entire subframe has to drop (hell, you almost have to do that for the stocker)

  3. SexCpotatoes

    The “no title” bit is why the guy let the car go so cheap (if they actually did pay a mere $35). You HAVE to have a title to legally scrap an entire car. Otherwise you have to cut it up and scrap it a piece at a time (not that I would know!).

  4. steve

    Im kinda suspisus about dem pkturs I thnk sumbody don foto chopped up dem things

  5. Mulry

    Lulz. “Frontline ready” on the stripped van. Sounds about right for some of the auctions I’ve been to.

  6. Mad_Science

    Based on the linked post from last year, someone should tell these guys to get some better tires than what looks like Radial TAs.

    Oh, what a world of difference a set of Ecstas (sp?) or Direzzas (our choice) makes.

  7. Rex Kwon-Do

    Rex here ( ace driver for the Van Buren boys).Yes it would be cool to use some good sticky tires like that but remember that these are 15 by 10 wheels and there are not a lot of choices out there for us.Not to mention the performance advantage we would have with real tires.We tried to spend our money on the good stuff like the G20 van brakes and the totally unreliable sag 4-speed.By using cheep swap meet parts is the only way to keep things fair against the other $500 Lemons hand grenades.Can’t wait til Charlotte!

  8. Dave

    Hey I totally believe them about the blower, after all my G30 had twin turbos

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