After fortifying ourselves with a few shots of Powers’ Irish Whiskey and some Chicago-style pizza back at the motel in Joliet, we of the LeMons HQ crew are contemplating one of the most ridiculous, yet most amazing, entries in 24 Hours of LeMons history.

The 24 Hours of LeMons crew has packed the Tilt-A-Whirl into the fleet of GAZ-51s, and we’ll be showing up at the Rod Blagojevich Never-Say-Die 500 race for BS Inspection tomorrow morning.

Would you drive a 1965 Alfa Romeo Giulia “taxi” balls-to-the-wall from Tuxtla Guiterrez to Zacatecas? That’s what LeMons veterans Martin Lauber and Conrad Stevenson will start doing tomorrow!

LeMons Chief Perp Jay Lamm has signed a pledge never to write about cars again; he’s got it framed and hanging up in his office. He also tends to be extremely harsh on LeMons drivers who happen to be his friends. That means that he’s extra cruel to former auto-journo colleagues Csaba Csere, Tony Swan, […]

Yesterday, we honored Team Police Brutality for their repeated last-minute, knuckle-shredding thrashes on cars that warm the ice-cold hearts of the LeMons HQ staff. Today we honor Morrow’s Auto, the only team that rivals Police Brutality for sheer never-say-die futility heroism!

Even though a LeMons team that swaps an MR2 chassis under a Lancia Scorpion doesn’t need a theme, I think the members of Team Police Brutality ought to go with their foaming-at-mouth lunacy and wear straitjackets to the Rod Blagojevich Never-Say-Die 500 24 Hours of LeMons.

Here’s our very first second three-time People’s Choice winner!

Yeah, yeah, so an Alfa took the win on laps this afternoon. That’s nice, but what true LeMons aficionados really care about is the Index of Effluency… which also went to an Alfa!

After a long, exhausting drive, we’re lounging in a hot-sheet flophouse near Midway Airport. The internet connection here appears to be a cocktail-straw-diameter 300-baud pipeline, so I’ll keep this brief: the Corsa Nostra GTV6 has taken the win on laps at the Bull Oil Grand Prix 24 Hours of LeMons.

How is this possible? The Corsa Nostra Alfa GTV6, veteran of massive and repeated mechanical and driving failures at several previous LeMons events, ended the day sitting in first place!

Since I’m too busy to shoot sufficient photos to really capture a typical LeMons BS Inspection, I rely on the PillarCam timelapse camera to do the job for me.

For the first time since the Sears Point race in March, we had beautiful weather for a LeMons race. To go with the sunny skies and low-70s temperatures, we had some excellently LeMonic entries (including this completely de-bodied Crown Vic)… and some total cheaters.

Since Judge Jonny left the LeMons Supreme Court in order to work in a cubicle in LA, we’ve been scrambling to find LeMons Circuit Court judges to help out in the Penalty Box. For this weekend’s race in Michigan, we’ve shipped Judge Sam in from Savage, Minnesota.

Remember the Holy Nickelbag mid-engined, twin-turbo GMC van LeMons racer? The Morrow’s Auto maniacs have returned to Gingerman Raceway with victory in mind!

I’ve already ranted about the Soviet performance in the 1970 London-Mexico Rally, but we can’t possibly have enough Moskvitch 412 worship! English Russia has come through once again.